Part 4 of Basic Response Techniques:
Primary Responses to Bullying

A bully thrives on deception. If you can strip him of his camouflage, then you can deal with his true intentions, rather than with his typical cloud of confusion.

As you become proficient in forcing a bully to clearly explain himself, you can begin using specific weapons to completely unmask him (see Tools for Battle). Then others can see his ruthless manipulation.

Start by learning these fundamental techniques for uncovering a bully's true intentions. Review and practice them until they become second nature for you.

Primary Response Technique - Ask Questions
Step 1	Calm yourself and figure out what is really occurring
Step 2	Allow silence to settle around the bully's words before you speak
Step 3	Confront a bully with simple, direct questions
Step 4	Keep repeating your questions until he responds clearly

Secondary Response Technique - Use Paraphrasing
Step 1	Paraphrase attack and ask: Is that what you mean?
Step 2	Expect a new attack. Repeat step 1 for the new attack.
Step 3	Ask for specifics: What specifically did I do?
Step 4	Ask for his cooperation: Can we talk about it?
Step 5	Ask him to suggest a possible solution.
Step 6	Make a decision and state your intention.
Step 7	End the conversation.

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